The Burning Question: Letting Go of the Past

Happy Tuesday! I hope everyone is enjoying the cooler weather and all the goodness it brings with it [football]. I've been busy packing and decluttering and preparing for my decent downtown. I cannot wait!

Today I decided to answer another burning question! Today's question is in regards to starting fresh with a clean slate, something I am hoping to be doing (in the way of a new job) very, very soon. In Danielle's original post she asks what what would you be more of if you let go of your past.

Honestly, this is probably the easiest question I've ever been asked. I'd be more confident. I'd be more sure of myself, my actions, my convictions. I wouldn't let people [men] boss me around. I wouldn't avoid confrontation, or shy away from difficult situations. I'd worry less what other people thought of me and let more of my personality shine.

I'd be more of a visionary.

I'd be more of a leader.

I'd be more comfortable in my own skin.

I'd pursue my dreams of being a motivation speaker or a corporate trainer. I'd believe that I had love to give and words of wisdom that were worth being heard.

If I let go of my past and my failures and my scorns, I'd be fantasticly happy and content with my life.

So, what's stopping me? Why am not confident? Why have I let the world scare me away from living my dreams?

Man, I suck...and that's okay.

So, if you notice to the right of your screen...no, your other right, I've added a badge called "The Burning Question Series". This is from a blog by Danielle LaPorte, aka the woman I'm currently obsessed with. I'm also currently reading her book, The Fire Starter Sessions, and am convinced its going to change the way I think about my life, help me discover my next career, and lead me to bountiful bliss.

I've decided to throw some of the burning questions into a few of my posts to help me think through my feelings and maybe help me focus on how to change the course of my life. The first burning question that I'm going to answer is What do you suck at? According to my hero Danielle, when you admit your shortcomings, you give yourself permission to spend your energy on the things you're great at. So, in no particular order, here are the things I suck at:

Saying no. To anyone. Coworkers, friends, potential boyfriends. I've always been terrible at saying no. I'm inherently a people pleaser and I hate that if I say no to something, I'm potentially letting them down.

I also really suck at loving myself. This comes as no surprise to anyone, I'm sure. I mean, look at what topic I picked for my first burning questions post...one where I could spend time pointing out my flaws and ripping on myself. In fact, if I ever got a wrist tattoo, I'd get the word love with a heart, as a constant reminder to love myself. Even the thought of that makes me crazy, because it seems like it should be something you automatically do, but its so difficult for me.

I'm really awful at managing money. In fact, when I know I'm getting close to draining my bank account, I purposely avoid looking at it to see how little is in there. This is something I've had to force myself to start doing, as to not overdraw my account on a bi-weekly basis. In general, I like to avoid all things (and discussions) money-related.

I really hope that someday soon I marry a master chef, because I'm terrible at cooking. It's not that I am really all that bad at it, I just hate doing it. Taking the time to prepare the food, and cook it, and whatnot...blah. I'd live on cereal my whole life if I could. A meal in 30 seconds.

Calling people. I'm so bad at calling people. In general, I hate talking on the phone. I hate the awkwardness of starting a conversation and the even more awkward ending of the conversation. In the almost three months (wow, has it been that long???) since my grandmother has passed, I've really been beating myself up (see point 2) for not calling her more often. She was so great to talk to on the phone and she always called and chatted with people on a daily basis. I feel terrible that I didn't call more while she was at the rehab center to check on her.

Ah. I feel better all ready. I've admitted the things I suck at. Its really not that bad. There's nothing life threatening on that last, or even anything I couldn't get better at if I practiced. Now that I've freed my mind of the negative feelings, I can focus on the things that I opposite of suck at and cultivate those talents.

Feel free to share anything you suck at. It really is a refreshing feeling. We can have group therapy.